UU Wisdom

It was a lay-led service yesterday at church. The topic was 'Getting Old Ain't For Sissies'. Tom, one of the church members, gave a warm, funny and moving description of the challenges he is facing as he ages and deals with Parkinson's Disease.

Tom is 72 and has been diagnosed with Parkinson's for 10 years and aging since birth. He spoke about the compromises he's made over the years to curtail his activities as his physical capacity diminishes. Tom told us that one of the oddest features of Parkinson's is that his handwriting is shrinking. It keeps getting smaller and smaller.

Tom thanked other older congregants for modeling aging with grace. He became emotional when talking about his mother-in-law, who at 96, remained a vibrant, encouraging and non-judgmental person.

Tom's story was one of hope and attitude. In fact, as a foundation for his talk he used an essay by Roger Cohen titled 'Do not go gently into the night.' Tom is not going gently into the night. He still splits and stacks cord wood for his wood stove, although now he does it with his brother. Tom still rides his bicycle, now cycling 150 miles over three days rather than 300. And Tom refuses, at this point, to float into the 5th stage of grief - acceptance.

Tom's is the story of the human condition. To be alive is to be dealing with a death sentence. All of our stories end the same. How we live in each moment creates our character and either fills our lives with joy or with despair. Sometimes both.

For today, for now, I choose to follow Tom's lead and create and maintain a positive attitude.